Sunday, June 21, 2015

Dear Papa

Dear Papa,

         I can't believe you have been gone from this world over a year now. Sometimes I play the night we got that horrible phone call over and over in my head, but I have to accept it. I know you were in so much pain these last few years. I know you wanted to be at my wedding & stay on this Earth longer. I wish you didn't have to leave so soon. We are taking care of Granny for you and I KNOW you are in heaven watching down on us.
        I've been wanting to write you a letter because I found a picture on my phone of you reading a note at Aunt Beas that me or mama wrote to you. She would always write you little notes, but she could talk to you & you would always understand her. (She's pretty loud;)) So it hit me that I miss writing little things to you. I have so much I wished I would've told you. I loved when you would see any of your kids, grandkids, sisters, brother & friends and you always had the biggest smile & either kissed them or shook their hand. I love that about you. I look up to you just like ALL of your grandkids. We will always look up to you. I loved how you were so content with life. I wished you didn't lose your hearing so early in your life. I know that was hard on you. Some days with 6 kids & 11 grandchildren you were probably happy that you couldn't hear us all. I bet you can hear now. I 'm sure that was such a beautiful thing.
          Well I got chickens and ducks now, and I can see you smiling now. They drive me crazy but I love watching them. Some days I just sit and watch them & always end up thinking of you & Andy. Granny thinks its the funniest thing. So I love calling & telling her about just so I can hear her laugh. Wes got some too! We all miss you so much. Every family get together is hard, but we all keep it together for granny. I've been getting some brownie points ;)
           I know you want us to be happy. I have been reading in the bible more since that awful night. & I can say I'm much closer with the Lord because I can feel him and I see how much you loved him. I thank you for being the best role model. I wish I could have more days with you. I know mama & everyone feels the same. Please keep watching over us. WE love you!!


                                                    I love you, Papa. I'll write you soon.
                                                             Love Always, Kurstin

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